PLEASE NOTE: Even though this blog is now dormant there are many useful, insightful posts. Scroll back from the end or forward from the beginning. Also, check out my writer's blog. Periodically I will add posts here if they provide additional information about living well with Dementia / Alzheimer's Disease.

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Tears, Suffering, and Emotions

When I was going through chemo for Lymphoma some ten years ago, my doctor told me, "It is OK to cry ... but only for 15 minutes at a time." If you find you are crying for longer than that call me, I can help.

Buddhism tells me, "It is OK to sit with your suffering without being judgmental, just sit with it. See if there are any messages in it for you. Then bless it and have it go on its way as you go on your way."

Giving into emotions is OK and they tell me, "You are feeling these emotions as a barometer of how you are doing in this situation. Thank them, look for lessons in them, and then move on."

If you feel that you will become overwhelmed by your crying, suffering, and/or emotions or do not want to deal with them right at the moment, bless them, thank them, tell them you cannot sit with them right now. Invite them to come back another day when you are feeling stronger and send them on their way.

This may seem difficult to do but as I practice it often enough it works easily and well for me. Although one time when I was really feeling down and at the same moment I invited them to leave, the fire alarm system in my condo (it was around midnight) went off announcing "An emergency has been noted. Walk to the nearest exit stairwell and evacuate the building."

I got dressed, left the building, walked outside back to the lobby, found out that it was a false alarm, went back to my condo, and realized that in effect I was distracted enough that I was feeling better. I told my tears, suffering, and emotions that next time they should leave quietly!

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