Balance

During the session on Thursday with my Psychologist, I mused about dichotomies.

How can I feel so joyful and so sad at the same time. So contented and disoriented? So calm and so crazy?

How can I be enjoying being in the condo by myself, making all life decisions by myself, and sleeping so comfortably all night while missing the heck out of Gregory being next to me in the TV room, deciding together where to go for dinner, and sleeping lightly next to him in bed ready to monitor any night time needs?

How can I be feeling so strangely contented and so deeply devastated?

My therapist replied to my question of how I can be feeling such extremes at the SAME TIME saying something like this, "Michael, I would call that wisdom. Most people do not realize that joy and sorrow, for example, are the same emotion just opposite ends. Emotions are not good or bad. One is not bad and the other good. They both walk hand in hand. When one is able to keep the balance of those emotions more closely embraced in the center of their being, they are able to function in life more easily. This is not to undermine or diminish your loss with Gregory's changes but to recognize your strength and ability to carry on, which in the long term also benefits Gregory!"

Detachment

More and more, the tenants and writings of Buddhism talk to me of my life and more importantly my journey with Gregory through and beyond Alzheimer's.

—S.N. Goenka, “The Art of Living: Vipassana Meditation”, from The Buddha is Still Teaching: Contemporary Buddhist Wisdom, selected and edited by Jack Kornfield

By learning to remain balanced in the face of everything experienced inside, one develops detachment towards all that one encounters in external situations as well. However, this detachment is not escapism or indifference to the problems of the world. Those who regularly practice Vipassana become more sensitive to the sufferings of others and do their utmost to relieve suffering in whatever way they can—not with any agitation, but with a mind full of love, compassion, and equanimity. They learn holy indifference—how to be fully committed, fully involved in helping others, while at the same time maintaining balance of mind. In this way they remain peaceful and happy while working for the peace and happiness of others.

This is what the Buddha taught: an art of living. He never established or taught any religion, any “ism.” He never instructed those who came to him to practice any rites or rituals, any empty formalities. Instead, he taught them just to observe nature as it is by observing the reality inside. Out of ignorance, we keep reacting in ways which harm ourselves and others. But when wisdom arises—the wisdom of observing reality as it is—this habit of reacting falls away. When we cease to react blindly, then we are capable of real action—action proceeding from a balanced mind, a mind which sees and understands the truth. Such action can only be positive, creative, helpful to ourselves and to others.

Today we say goodbye to a teacher who had an immense impact on the world. S.N. Goenka was a pioneer in making Vipassana meditation widely available to a secular audience. Over 170 meditation centers have been established around the globe under his auspices. His legacy will resound indefinitely. 

Taken from: http://www.tricycle.com/wisdom-collection

Wisdom's Questions

When it’s time to suffer, you should suffer; when it’s time to cry, you should cry. Cry completely. Cry until there are no more tears and then recognize in your exhaustion that you’re alive. The sun still rises and sets. The seasons come and go. Absolutely nothing remains the same and that includes suffering. When the suffering ends wisdom begins to raise the right questions.

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Seido Ray Ronce

Namaste