Controling the Uncontrollable

I was just talking with my therapist the other day about feeling somewhat gloomy about the suffering going on around me in the world with ISIS, and police violence, etc. He mirrored below saying, "there has always been suffering in the world." Then added, "It is what we do with it." When you read today's Daily OM horoscope for Aries, I would say it applies to all signs of the zodiac and could very well apply to all caregivers taking care of the ones they love.

March 13, 2015 Creating a Loving World Aries Daily HoroscopeYour concern about the state of affairs in the world today could leave you feeling unsettled. Because of the care you have for others in your heart, you might be sensitive to the problems you see around you and may feel helpless to ease them. Reminding yourself that even though there has always been suffering in the world you still have the power to manifest more positive things through your thoughts and actions make help you feel a greater sense of control over the uncontrollable. Should you, for example, hear something that makes you feel gloomy, you might take a few minutes to send your love to that person and wish them well. Try to imagine them enveloped in a bath of your loving energy. Changing your focus so that your thoughts are positive and hopeful could make you feel better today. Hope for our world begins with ourselves—. We can'’t control the world around us, but we can control our minds. Even though things may seem hopeless, if we can tune out the negative and set our minds on the positive, we will begin to have greater control over our reactions to world events. This is an important first step toward taking action to make our world a better place. If you can channel more love into your heart today and extend that love to others, you will alter the vibratory energy of our world subtly and pave the way to create more peace and optimism around you.

Emptiness

This article makes me feel only a little better but when I fell "empty" I equate it with "sad." It discusses emptiness as "an infinitely open space that allows for anything to appear, change, disappear, and reappear. The basic meaning of emptiness, in other words, is openness, or potential." and for the most part, that makes me feel sad. Alzheimer's does that! It helps you focus on the negative rather than the positive. I have been working on changing that for a long time now. Sometimes it works, other times it doesn't.

 Shambhala Publications

THE MEANING OF EMPTINESS

—Tsoknyi Rinpoche, from The Best Buddhist Writing 2013 http://www.shambhala.com/the-best-buddhist-writing-2015.html

“Emptiness” is a rough translation of the Sanskrit term shunyata and the Tibetan term tongpa-nyi. The basic meaning of the Sanskrit word shunya is “zero,” while the Tibetan word tongpa means “empty”—not in the sense of a vacuum or a void, but rather in the sense that the basis of experience is beyond our ability to perceive with our senses and or to capture in a nice, tidy concept. Maybe a better understanding of the deep sense of the word may be “inconceivable” or “unnameable.”

So when Buddhists talk about emptiness as the basis of our being, we don’t mean that who or what we are is nothing, a zero, a point of view that can give way to a kind of cynicism. The actual teachings on emptiness imply an infinitely open space that allows for anything to appear, change, disappear, and reappear. The basic meaning of emptiness, in other words, is openness, or potential. At the basic level of our being, we are “empty” of definable characteristics.
 

Ride a Camel Anyone?

My adventurous brave little boy.

The above meditation arrives daily at my e-mail's door. This one spoke loudly to me as often, in the midst of our Alzheimer's Journey, I am not able to interpret or see how to apply the meditation.

WONDERFUL THINGS THAT THERE ALREADY ARE

Gregory often tells me he loves me.

His five to nine year old boy behaviors are endearing.

He tries hard to "get it right."

He seems to hold on to knowing what he doesn't know, like do NOT use the garbage disposal.

Gregory always says thank you.

He enjoys the meals I prepare for him and "goes on" about how delicious they are.

Says "Oh Goodie" when I tell him about our next adventure or who is coming to visit.

He still tries to communicate although words usually fail him.

In bed at night, we hold hands as we fall asleep.

He apologizes when he does something stupid.

Gregory tells me that I cannot always be calm and understanding.

He loves to paint and always looks forward to seeing his mentor/teacher/friend Nancy.

He shows me the daily architectural picture in his calendar.

He makes the bed when he thinks of it.

He laughs at my jokes and silliness. 

I love him.

Noah's Ark

Got this inspirational e-mail from a friend and while their intention was good, it rubbed me the wrong way. So last night I went in and "red line" commented. All negative. This morning I realized that and went back in to "green line" and to try to see the positive. What do you think?

• • • • •

I am not afraid of tomorrow for I have seen yesterday and I love  am having a hard time with today. But today is really all we have and it is what we do with it!

Noah's Ark :  Everyting I need to know, I learned from Noah's Ark. I doubt it. We learn from many places and people and experiences. 

ONE: Don't miss the boat. It’s got nothing to do with being on the boat. It has to do with making good decisions, being a caring person, love.

TWO: Remember that we are all in the same boat! Not true, we each have our separate problems to deal with and our own successes. While we all come from the same source how we live our lives can be different as night and day.

THREE: Plan ahead. It wasn't raining when Noah built the Ark. Sometimes there is no way to guess what might be needed in the future. So just live one day at a time and do the best you can.

FOUR: Stay fit. When you're 60 years old, someone may ask you to do something really big. A shame if you waited until you were 60 to do something really big. Hopefully your life will be filled with many big things over time, especially if you know how to look for them.

FIVE: Don't listen to critics; just get on with the job that needs to be done. This is somewhat true although sometimes the critics are right. Most important however, is to listen to yourself, to your heart.

SIX: Build your future on high ground. No matter how high the ground you might still drown. Or you might know how much is enough and live purely and simply.

SEVEN: For safety's sake, travel in pairs. Sometimes the pairs work and other times you need to leave the other behind. Actually LOVE is all you have.

EIGHT: Speed isn't always an advantage. The snails were on board with the cheetahs.  Sometimes delayed actions miss the opportunity. Traveling is the point not how slowly or quickly.

NINE: When you're stressed, float awhile. Or drown. Or have a good cry, meditate, count what you are grateful for and the stress will dissipate. 

TEN: Remember, the Ark was built by amateurs; the Titanic by professionals. And they both caused a lots of deaths. Either way we all die and what counts is how we spent our life and how we loved.

ELEVEN: No matter the storm, when you are with God, there's always a rainbow waiting. If God exists and while there might be a rainbow waiting it usually disappears with the sun. God is within, trust yourself, know what matters, LOVE!

You'll Know

You'll know that things are not going well when you find many posts here. It is a way for me to process and put to rest, at least for a brief while before the next one, the injuries sustained by the most recent explosion.

Perhaps I should try to write about the good things that happen.

Like Gregory just having brought me half a pear (the other half for his lunch) sliced and beautifully arranged on a plate.

Or the fact that this time when folding the underwear, he got his size and my size correctly into different piles. In the past I have found myself unwittingly trying to fit myself into his underpants which were neatly folded into my drawer. Not a pretty sight if you know how slender he is and how ample I am.

Or how he tells me every night before we drift off to sleep how much he loves me.

For these things I am grateful.