Another Milestone

Another milestone passed today as Gregory's body was cremated. Depressing. Morbid. Macabre. Frightening. Surreal. Sad. But these negatives are supplanted with JOY when you think that his earthly body was currently the home of Dementia/Alzheimer's and all that the disease brings. Now he is free.

Now that his body is no longer his address and after 67 years of serving him well (minus a few for Dementia/ Alzheimer's) his body is reduced to its essence and if the remaining carbon was put under great pressure, he would become another version of the bright, shining diamond which he was throughout his life.

Although he never complained and settled in at Lieberman in his usual calm, confident way; he no longer has to face being confined to a wheelchair, his newly acquired narrow life, shitting and peeing himself, not being able to feed himself, to frustration and confusion (although dampened by Rxsperadol,) not being able to communicate and often not being able to understand. He no longer needs to deal with reduced mental, physical, emotional, and cognitive abilities. He is free to fly and to dance.

That is not to say (especially reminded when looking at photographs of him) that his days with Dementia/Alzheimer's were also not filled with love and joy for him and for those who love him. Even in his reduced state he kept his sense of humor and gave freely of his love and smiles to others around him, including no only me but also family and friends and his fellow residents.

So we reach a new milestone in Gregory's life. His moving on to the next adventure: whatever, wherever, and however that may be. I believe that there is something greater then here. Just because I cannot see it, that doesn't mean it doesn't exist. Just because I cannot prove it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. What I also know is that I cannot prove that is doesn't exist, so I will err on the side of "he is in a better place."

Today's Daily Word

... with, as usual, a few adjustments.

Free I am free to re-create myself. Wednesday, October 7, 2015 In the same way laws and textbooks change with the times, I update my understanding of spiritual freedom. I am free to make different choices and re-create myself. With prayer and meditation as my primary tools, I release worn-out ways of being and acting in the world. I choose to see people and situations differently. I free myself from faulty thinking and embrace productive thoughts. I affirm the fresh choices that are possible and my responsibility toward others in those choices. I have the power to change because I am an expression of have God within. In deepest gratitude, I give thanks for the opportunities available to me in every moment.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhPcWRMEBXU&spfreload=10

This video contains, from Plum Village and Thich Nhat Hanh, a song/chant that has become Gregory and my theme song. The first two lines talk of Gregory's being free and the second two lines talk of my being free.