More Memories from Pat

A post from my dear friend Pat Anderson

Pat Anderson

47 mins · 

This is my friend Gregory who passed away a couple weeks ago. (See Michael Horvich for more info if you wish.) Preparing to move, I was having trouble getting rid of this well-worn and very old teddy bear. I took it to visit Gregory. Now I will have a harder time getting rid of it.

Pat Remembers

This was taken from Pat's Facebook page.

I never knew Gregory “before.” When I met him, his Alzheimer’s had progressed significantly, but was often not evident to a casual observer. We’d go for long walks, and visit the bird shelter to hug a big parrot. He had an art show. When we ate at restaurants, he needed help ordering.

As time passed, he needed help zippering his jacket, putting on his gloves, and pouring his Perrier into his glass. When I offered to do these things, he was always grateful. Through all this, he was patient with himself, and handled his confusion with grace and dignity, at least in front of me. 

Moreover, he never lost his manners, like standing aside for me to go through doorways first (although I felt he should go first, so I could watch over him.) Alzheimer’s stole a lot from him but he remained responsive and gentle and agreeable with me. 

While I do not begrudge him the relief of his death, I regret that I no longer have him as a model. We must remember these things in our hearts and continue to be the better person our friends inspire us to be.

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Michael Horvich That's why I love you. You and Gregory instantly bonded and you were always gracious but not condescending to him. He loved you so and I swear, when you visited him at Lieberman, he was usually happier to see you than me smile emoticon I am not jealous but it made me love you all the more.

You You, Me Me, Wa Wa Wee

Our friend Pat took this video of Gregory. 

In an e-mail yesterday, she explained: "It's from July. We were fooling around with singing & you can hear him respond to me by going lower & lower. Even though he was not looking at me, he obviously heard me & responded. I think it was the same visit I got him going & he sang "you-you-you" (or yoo-yoo-yoo"  & then, when I said playfully that I liked that song, especially since it was all about 'me,' he launched into the opposite, a song "me-me-me."  Or at least that's how I interpreted it."

For some wonderful reason, Pat and Gregory and Gregory and Pat built such a huge bond in the short time they knew each other. 

At Lieberman, he loved his time with Manny his private care helper and friend, was a pleasantly surprised to see long time friend and housekeeper Halina at his side, was always happy to see me, and always pleased to receive visitors. 

But the reception he gave Pat always seemed to be the largest of all with verbal "Wonderful" or "Oh My Oh My" or "WaWaWee!" She was probably the most loyal friend in her bringing Gregory treats and surprises and visits.

I am grateful for Pat who defines what a true friend can be.

Earlier Times

Pat just shared these photos with me. 

Pat joined Gregory and me for a

long weekend in Puerto Villarta.

Gregory and Pat in the condo.