FOR GREGORY

Periodically I will add posts here if the sources provide additioanl informaiton on how to think about and deal with Dementia/ Alzheimer's Disease.

PLEASE NOTE:


SCROLL DOWN FOR TEXT and BIBLIOGRAPHY from DAI WEBINAR 2/22-23/2017. You can also find this information on my website: www.horvich.com


Even though this blog is now dormant (see info below) there are many useful, insightful posts. Scroll back from the end or forward from the beginning. My guess is that you could spend a lot of time here and maybe learn or experience a thing or two about living with and loving someone with Dementia/Alzheimer's or maybe come away with the feeling that "you are not alone" in YOUR work with the same!


• • • • •


THIS WAS THE FINAL POST TO THIS SITE BEFORE IT WENT DORMANT.


Happy New Year 2016. With a new year comes new beginnings and sometimes endings. If I am personally progressing and if I am doing a good job in my grieving Gregory's death; if I have been able to learn my lessons in living and loving someone diagnosed with Dementia/ Alzheimer's; if I am to get on with my life ... I need to bring this Alzheimer's blog to an end since my writing has been dealing less with Dementia/ Alzheimer's and more with life after Dementia/ Alzheimer's.


Of course, I will always continue to work for and support fair treatment on behalf of people with Dementia/ Alzheimer's and may post here from time to time. Also, there are many wonderful posts here through which you may browse.


With this change, I will continue and reinvigorate my "michael a. horvich writes" blog which deals with grieving Gregory's death, life lessons, personal experiences, observations, memoirs, dreams, and humor in essay and poetry, as well as an attempt now and then at sharing a piece of fiction.


Please follow me there by clicking http://mhorvich.blogspot.com or click the link located on the right side of this page.


Finally, COMMENTS are always important to me and you can still comment on the posts on this blog! CLICK "Comments" and sign in or use "Anonymous." Leave your name or initials if you wish so I'll know it's you? Check the "Notify Me" box to see my reply to you.



Saturday, June 6, 2015

Behind the Door


This is the door to Gregory's room at Lieberman Center. All of the rooms at the center are private which is fortunate for the residents.

When it is time for Gregory to be changed from a poo or pee, two RCAs (Resident Care Associates) bring the Hoyer Lift into his room (he needs to be transferred to the bed by a lift machine) and close the door.

Manny is the third person in the room to provide continuity, a friendly face (not that the RCAs have unfriendly faces,) and to provide a calming influence while the RCAs proceed with the work of changing Gregory.

When I am there, I do not stay in the room but step out and sit in the hall. Sometimes it is all I can do to stay seated and not burst into the room!

Gregory is not completely cooperative with his changing. He is uncomfortable, frightened at times, and possibly in some pain with the lifting and rolling and cleaning of skin. He shouts out loudly, stiffens his body, and at times swears.

His "responsive behaviors" can be frightening to someone listening, often cause the RCAs extra work and care, but must be recognized for what they are: Gregory responding to the experience without the use of language available to him.

How would you like to be hoisted in the air, swung over to the bed, dropped in place, get your wet/dirty clothes pulled off, get rolled this way and that, have many people in the room as you lie there naked, have your privates cleaned, get a new set of "paper pants," have new clean clothes pulled on, get hoisted up again, and dropped back into your wheel chair. YOU WOULD YELL TOO!

According to Manny much of the "noise" Gregory makes is due to what is going on in his head, not necessarily because of pain or discomfort. "OUCH! DAM IT! GET AWAY! NO,NO,NO! OH GOD! I WON'T" are some of the expletives. Now and then Gregory growls and often he laughs as part of the routine.

When it is over and done, and the door is open, I get up and go into the room, thanking the RCAs and renewing with Gregory the knowledge of my presence. "Hi love. I am back. You did a good job."

After a few minutes Gregory is calm and back to "normal." It is as if the ordeal never happened. And that is part of the blessing of dementia, Gregory no longer holds on to the event and gets on with whatever is next, like a drink of water, a piece of chocolate, or turning on the TV.




2 comments:

  1. Michael, I was thinking about this whole experience of "toileting" last night and how humiliating and frightening us must be for someone with dementia. I just can't imagine it really. And it's hardly surprising that people "resist" like Gregory does. As you say, who wouldn't!?

    He is so lucky to have such a loving and committed partner. He is truly blessed. And so are you for holding his hand through this journey. XOX Susan

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Susan. Yes, both Gregory and I are blessed as we continue this journey or should I say "ride?" Ride if only because sometimes the best we can do is sit tight, hold on, and hold hands, and endure the bumps, jerks, and turns.

      I did not mention that Gregory is 6'7" and weighs 190. He is a "Big Boy" as I used to call him.

      I am about to write about DRUGS in a favorable way in relation to situations like toileting so let me know what you think.

      Delete

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