The Semblance of a Tape Measure

I don't know how to measure this. Let it suffice to say, "He is getting worse." But that does not begin to measure the change. Lets just say, "He is getting worse. Has has been getting worse. He will continue to get worse."


When you live with a person who has a Dementia, you slowly acclimate as they slowly deteriorate. This makes it even harder to measure. The changes are slow, moderate, and sometimes fast. Sometimes the changes will work in reverse but it is more like they "pop up" here and there, now and then, but never consistantly. 


This causes difficulty measuring the progress of the Dementia.


Language continues to fail. Most of the time he will begin to say something but after the set up he cannot continue. More and more, if he can't get it and if it isn't obvious to me, we just let it go and don't even try to figure it out. 


This causes not only are difficulty measuring the progress but also difficulty predicting the progress.


Cognition continues to fail. He gets confused over simple operations like buttering his toast or deciding where to put the butter in the first place. He emptied the sink strainer then threw it away with the garbage. He was about to go for a walk and I discovered that he did not have his keys. Then I checked and while he had his cell phone holster on his belt, it was empty. His wallet was still in the drawer. Yet his coat, scarf, gloves, and hat were on and he was ready to leave.


I could not even discuss the messed up situation with him because he could not follow and said something like, "I was going to do that next." However, he didn't really know that he did not have his keys on or his cell phone in. 


Often now, when I ask if he has his cell phone, he does not know where to look for it. He will search one pocket then the other not remembering that the cell phone should be in the holster on his belt. The look on his face tells me that without seeing the object, he may not even understand what the words "CELL PHONE" mean.


This causes not only  difficulty measuring progress but also difficulty predicting the progress and finally difficulty even understanding what form the progress is taking.


Semblance is the word that comes to mind. There is a semblance of order in our life, a semblance of routine, a semblance of a semblance of a life. 


semblance |ˈsembləns|. noun. the outward appearance or apparent form of something, esp. when the reality is different : she tried to force her thoughts back into some semblance of order.

Both Gregory and I "try to force our thoughts back into some semblance of order" all the time. Some days we do well, most days we do not.