Existence

Yesterday Gregory and I ran an errand at the hardware store. He was at my side as we went from department to department and as the various store personnel helped us fine what we needed. Then we headed for the checkout.

Sometime between the heading and the checking out, Gregory disappeared. I realized it when I had my paid goods in hand and was ready to head for the car. No Gregory. I wasn't really worried and what good would worrying do anyway?

I looked outside to see if he had decided to wait by the car. No Gregory. I went back into the store and one of the clerks (who knows us) pointed towards the back of the store and said, "He went that way."

I walked half way back, called out, and from around the corner came Gregory. "Where were you? I asked.

"Looking for you," he replied.

I took him in hand (literally) and firmly but lovingly (and probably with a little relief, a little fear for the future, and a little anger) told him that he needs to stay with me. "In the few minutes it took for me to pay the cashier, you disappeared! That is wandering. That scares me. That can't happen. If need be I'll just have to keep you in sight at all times like a mother hen does with her chicks."

"I am sorry. I try my best."

"I know, but it is like when I have to deal with the 800 operator at the phone company and they apologize for making you wait and for messing up your bill and for not being able to do anything about it ... apologizing doesn't help!!!"

I became quiet on our way back to the car and stayed quiet once in. Gregory was quiet as well. I knew he felt bad but I just had to take a moment or two to regroup.

Finally I said to him something that surprised me when it came out of my mouth, "You know when things like that happen, I PRETEND I DON"T EXIST." Then I added, "I love you. I know you try. We'll be OK."